Summertime and Nicknames

What's the date? September 12th? Where does the time go? I know where: into hours of playing with our bouncing baby boy, Liam. Also known as Bup, Nox, The Little Vampire, and of course, The Little Guy. Or to be more precise, "thelittleguy," said fast, as in, "what's thelittleguy doing now, Savannah?"

How do nicknames like "Bup" start? Who knows. It just seems like he bups along, happy and laughing.

Nox we don't use much, but I called him that after he was born on the Spring Equi(nox). Little Vampire? He gets that at 1 a.m. from sleepless mom after he plays for two solid hours in the middle of the night. In the dark. By himself. His teeth are coming in, we are checking for fangs.

As for "thelittleguy," that's no mystery, he's a little guy. But we say it so often it sort of runs together into a name of its own.

Soon enough, though, he'll be Little Houdini, Chatterbox or some such, as the crawling and talking phases are coming on strong.

It's been a great summer. Savvy and I have both been working very hard, but we did take some breaks, including an overnight stay near Government Camp in a cozy creekside cabin and numerous walks to parks around Portland. We did a longer hike up to Mirror Lake and even got lost - for about 15 minutes.

We hope you have had a good summer as well. Here are the latest photos! Just click to see them super-sized or to print one up.


This image was on Liam's baptism announcement. The "big dip" went well. We have no photos of the event, just video (shot by Angela), and, uh, even we have not seen it yet. But I will post it to YouTube this weekend.


Guess who's turning 3? Ella is a great dog - the best. Liam pulls out handfulls of her hair, pokes her in the eye and yanks on her tail. She doesn't move a muscle in anger. He favorite spot during the day is anywhere close to Liam. Here she is relaxing in the car after our Mirror Lake hike. That's a happy dog.


Liam sits up now. We have to get him there, and he still topples over, but less each day. Here he is exploring the field at Rose City Park.


That boy has a way with the girls - already! While playing in the park, a gaggle of kids from a birthday party happened by. This girl, Ariel, was instantly smitten. She just had to hold him.


It's a Liam attack! Actually, this behavior is called "birding" or "flying," and is a prelude to crawling, except all the landing gear is up. It's still pretty funny to see.


Liam cried for his first home bath (captured on video). I think that was the last time, though (for the crying, not the bathing). This kid loves to get in the tub with mom or dad and kick, splash and laugh.


Uh oh, you know what's coming when all the gear is down. At this point he's frozen in place. Not for long, I'm sure.


This one of my favorite photos so far. He looks ready to pounce!


This was taken during the sequence I shot for his baptism card. It was not what I had in mind for the card (the one I used was), but this was an unexpected treasure from that photo session, which took 5 minutes at most. Be sure to take lots of photos of your kids. It's important.


Here's our little hiker on the trail in Mt. Hood wilderness in August, actually on the Pacific Crest Trail, which stretches from Canada to Mexico. We took a lunch break and during that time a guy came by who was doing the whole trail. Nice guy, too. He was 62 and had been on the trail since April. Now that's impressive.


Back at the park, sittin' in the grass. Man, these summer days go by so fast.


Here we are at Mirror Lake near Mt. Hood. Liam is getting some hands-on with the local timber. Gotta have a hat or the sun at that altitude (4,000 feet) with burn baby skin in just a few minutes.


Our friends have a house with a big pool and threw a swell party. Liam loves the water. Swim lessons will come early.


Back out on the Pacific Crest Trail with Savvy and Ella. Savannah and Liam are traveling to Texas and Florida soon to visit Savannah's family and take a much needed vacation. Bill will be stuck all alone at home to work and be lonely. Gotta go, I think the beer truck just pulled up....

See you again soon!

Say Cheese

Well, faithful blog readers, thanks for checking back in. We have been remiss about updates this summer as we are so busy as expected, but I wanted to take this time to post a bunch of photos. Not much to report - summer is here, Liam is growing and growing and becoming more of a little person each day. His blonde hair is growing in, he babbles like crazy and loves to giggle and laugh. He is healthy and we are thankful for that most of all. We hope you are well and enjoying summer. Onto the photos! (Captions are under each photo. Click on the photo to see it larger or for printing.)


This photo of Liam and very big brother Caleb is indicative of their bond - right from the start. While Caleb was here and not in the same room as Liam, Liam would look and look and look for him. Brothers indeed. Photo by Savannah.


Hmmm... I wonder if we're related? Photo by Caleb.


We had a super fun weekend in Astoria with our friends Angela and Pete. Angela is our dearest friend and was a great support during Liam's birth. She makes the world more beautiful with plant design and feng shui. Pete is a new-found friend we are thrilled to know. He is a talented musician, plant person, general instigator of chaos, and maker of miracle 40-foot baskets while playing HORSE. Photo by Bill.


Liam in fine orange hat form while in Astoria. On July 21, he was four months old. Photo by Bill.


Too low on the hat, dad! Too low!!


Most teen boys want to keep their mom at a distance as the transistion to being a man gets rolling. Not Caleb. His great love for Savannah and his communication skills are quite amazing. It was a great day at the beach. Photo by Bill.


Not much to say here from me. Choose your own 1,000 words. Photo by Bill.


Mr. Caleb has taken an interest in photography and has quite an eye. I only gave him a few pointers, and I was elated to see him take most of his photos in Black and White, and take good ones as well. The mark of an emerging master! Photo by Caleb.


Our sweet Savannah as photographed by her son, Caleb.


Aye, there be some fine eyelashes, just like daddy has. I'll teach you to use those later, my boy..... Photo by Bill


Ah, the favorite spot for Liam. Baby packs are great (thanks, Native Americans!). He's outgrown this one and is into a bigger one now. Photo by Bill.


Steps to get Liam to sleep: 1) Insert Liam into pack. 2) Begin walking.


A fine color photo by Caleb of Doc and Mary Alice's constant companion, Uncle Joey.


Caleb walks the beach with the Astoria Bridge in the background. Photo by Bill.


"Buy 500 shares of Google, cancel my meeting with Bono and warm up that bottle, pronto!" Photo by Savannah.


A little peck for my little guy. Photo by Caleb.

We'll post more photos soon! Love,

Bill, Savannah, Liam and Ella the dog...

Happy Birthday Caleb!

15 years ago today, I became a mother.

Caleb came into the world with intensity and fierce will. He was a “fussy” baby. There were many long hours that we sat together in the night, rocking and rocking. Later that intensity turned into a very inquisitive and precocious toddler. He was talking in full sentences at age two and his favorite phrase was, “Yes, I know, but WHY?”

As a young boy, he was all physical energy and willful strength. Out in the yard swinging a stick at the tree or rolling around on the floor, playing with anything and everything, he was just plain fun to watch.

Caleb taught me my current parenting style by pure survival. I learned that children develop into independent humans with a sense of personal responsibility when you meet their needs foremost and invite their participation. And with Caleb, I found I could never win by coercion, but we could win together through connection.

I have for years called Caleb my “cling-on”. He is a nurturing, affectionate guy with lots of love to share. Particularly with his Mama; how blessed I am!

He is now a compassionate, creative and communicative young man. I am so proud of his kindness and maturity as a human being. I think one of the greatest things a parent can feel is that their kid is someone they actually are honored to know.

I am better person because he came along.

Thank you Caleb for being my boy, for teaching me about being a mother and for making the world brighter.

Two Months Young

Remember, to see a larger version of a photo, click on it!
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Liam was born two months ago today. Sixty days. What a short time for a life. I can hear a radio announcer’s voice saying:
“Try our product for sixty days and if not satisfied, return for a full refund.”

I think we will keep him.

He had some exciting firsts this weekend:
He met his “due date” buddy Kiran (they were due the exact same day) and had a play date with him on Mama Breana’s couch. Liam was feeling quite the pirate that day.

His first ride on a max train went really well. He snuggled up in my babyhawk carrier and enjoyed the motion of the train while being close to my body (so much nicer than a car seat).



He met his Grandpa Johnny from Texas for the first time. We all had brunch in a restaurant with nice tablecloths and wine glasses and he didn’t even howl. He fell asleep peacefully in his Papa’s arms without a whimper.



And he slept for five hours in a row one night! I woke up after four hours in a panic wondering if he was still breathing (he was right beside me in bed). I had not had more than two hours sleep in a row for over two months.

I feel like a different woman, more alive, more human, with more brain cells.

All in all, the past two months have been exhausting and wonderful.


Here are more recent photos of Liam!

A Mother’s Heart

By Savannah

I am the mother of two boys.

I never thought I would say that.

When I found out that Liam was a boy (at around 20 weeks pregnant), I felt excited, surprised and nervous.

I already have a boy. Caleb will be fifteen (really? REALLY???) in July. We have gone through a lot together and I almost feel like I grew up right along with him. As a mom at 21, I had a lot to learn and he taught me well. I sometimes worry about all the mistakes I made. When he found out about Liam he said, “You get a second chance.”

He and I both knew exactly what he meant.

Before Liam was born, I couldn’t imagine loving another son as much as Caleb. There is something so unique about him. I know every mother says that about her child, but everywhere we went, folks said, “who is that kid?” I was known around Austin as “that cool kid Caleb’s mom.”

I remember vividly the first minute I met him, tiny fist stuffed in his mouth.

I can still feel his the weight and trust of his body in my arms, the smell of his newborn head and milky breath.

I can hear his sweet toddler voice and the funny and wise things he said. As a young boy, his clarity and connection to his own emotions was startling. He saw right through any bull and spoke up. He used vocabulary words that would put a college student to shame. He expressed himself minute by minute with such focus.

And now as a teenager, he is startling in his sense of self. I have no idea what the future holds for him, but have always trusted that he would make a difference in the world.

And now there is Liam. We are just getting to know each other but already he reminds me so much of his bigger brother (the loud wail, the direct eye contact so early, the “I know what I want and I want it now” voice) and yet he is uniquely himself with aspects I can not yet imagine.

And these two boys have yet to meet.

Caleb is in Texas with his Dad and Step-Mom, He is struggling through the usual challenges of maturing. Sometimes when I talk to him, I remind myself what it felt like to be a freshman in High School. I hated everything and almost everyone. That he will even speak to me regularly is in itself a miracle.

He will be here in June for his summer visit.

I have this sense that my heart will split wide open when I see these two boys side by side. How could I have created so much beauty?

"Making the decision to have a child -- it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." --Elizabeth Stone

One piece of my heart I can keep close to protect and nurture, at least for a few more years. The other is about to get his driver’s license. My experience of being a mother right now is both bewildering and tender.

Don't Blink

By Bill

I was at work last week and was showing a co-worker the blog. My co-worker is a mother of two boys, who are under 10 years old. She was looking at the photos of Liam, tiny as he is now, and saying “I’d give anything for my boys to be that small again – just for a few minutes.”

This statement struck me as odd, and I asked her why. For a moment, she had that faraway look and quietly said, “Oh, I don’t know, I guess it was just a special time. And then you blink and they are in school.”

Being the latest New Dad, I get a lot of advice from my coworkers and from my big family. Cherish this, enjoy that, remember this time. You’ll blink and he’ll be in college.

That one I get a lot.

I checked and in the last six weeks, I have shot about 30 minutes of video of Mr. Liam since he was born, most right after his birth. For a video guy like me, that’s not much (I’ve taken about 1,000 photos, however). So I’ve been doing more video lately, and shooting some really pedestrian stuff, like me holding Liam while he’s asleep, or while he’s fussing a bit on his own. And we finally got his really cute sneeze on tape. All are good moments.

Upon reflection, I realized why I thought my co-workers comment was odd to me. I really look at this time in his life as sort of something to “get through” until bigger moments arrive: talking, walking, and general participatory activity.

Right now, it’s basically lots of diaper changes, crying, lack of sleep (mostly for Savvy) and trying to figure out what he wants. He also has a bit of colic, so that can be a challenge as well. His quiet, playful times seem few and far apart.

Don’t get me wrong, I love having the little guy around and am so thankful he is healthy and (usually) happy.

But when out and about with him on a walk in the park, I see other parents with kids just a bit older. They are pushing them on the swing sets, giggling on the teeter-totter, and learning to play catch. Those are the days I look forward to.

However, I realize that looking forward is a trap as well, as it makes you forget about the present. A central tenet of Buddhism is to be mindful of the present, and I try to incorporate that into my busy life (although working in the news business helps).

To paraphrase Zen Master Yoda (yeah, from Star Wars): “always with you it is the future, the far horizon. Never your mind on where you are, what you are doing.” Or something like that. But that describes me sometimes, and probably most people. It is part of our consumer culture: show me the Next Big Thing.

So I am trying to focus on the present. Today is Sunday, and Liam woke up around 7:30 a.m. He was fussing and grunting, which means he has gas, so I gave him some Gripe Water with an oral syringe and that seems to help (as does farting). Then we listened to Air on my laptop on iTunes, with the visualizer on, which he loves to watch (we think it will give him mathematical superpowers).

Today, we have a few errands to run, nothing major, and later on, dinner with the folks. The future, as it were, soon to be the past. Now he is asleep, taking his morning nap. Mom is asleep as well, trying to pay down the large sleep debt. Soon enough he will be awake, hungry, with a poopy diaper and probably some gas that will make him cry and cry.

It is the present moment, and I am working to be mindful of the here and now, that which is, and not so much what will be. Soon enough, these days will be gone, never to return for Liam and his parents.

Don’t blink.